Hito's Cinematic Universe Volumes 1, 2, and possibly 3

by Miah Dennis


hecking epic stuff written by miah of hito's characters B-) not necessarily an accurate depiction of them but still very very cool nonetheless. also the title was by our friend marcus so kudos to him. all of the volumes are fuckshit and not really that related ecks dee

Vol. 1 - Unepic


It was April 20th of 1996, a blonde blue-eyed baby boy was born to a woman named Cynthia. Cynthia looked towards her husband and signaled him to write a name on the birth certificate. He wrote Jeff and began dying laughing on the floor.

"Aye bro stop joking around and write Laurence's damn name on the paper."

"Aight Aight"

His parent's finish their speech off recalling the day Laurence were born something they remember like the back of their hand. Everyone starts to kekeke and applaud. Laurence stands and thanks everyone for coming to celebrate his graduation from high school. He began to walk around the room and mingle, but at some point he started to get a little claustrophobic and made his way to the guest bedroom where he knew there wouldn't be anyone (BOY WAS HE DUMB). Laurence walked in and saw something that crushed him. It was his girlfriend of 4 years, Wendy A making out with a friend of his. All Laurence saw was red, filled with rage he began to shout curses.

"WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? AND HERE OF ALL PLACES GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE BOTH OF YOU!"

Steamy, tears began to fall from Laurence's face as he locked the door behind Wendy and her newest friend. He began to pace around the room getting more upset with each step. He began to wonder if Wendy had been into girls before they dated even going beyond to wonder if she had been doing this even earlier in their relationship. Laurence's phone began to vibrate in his pocket. It was messages from Wendy.

WENDY [5:36] hey im real sorry you had to see that

WENDY [5:36] in all honesty i really did have plans to tell you before graduation but you were so happy I didn't want to hurt you

LAURENCE [5:38] idrc if you don't mind delete my number, and remove yourself from any social media you have me on

LAURENCE [5:39] ...sign out of my netflix and hulu accounts too gaylord

Laurence stayed in the room for almost an hour before he was ready to go out and participate again. As soon as he opened the door he came face to face with a guy who looked like a mega fucking loser. The guy had small eyes and homeless person-like hair.

"The FUCK are you looking at GAYWAD?" Laurence asked with puffy eyes and a tear stained face.

"I didn't know anybody here and a couple started making out on the couch I was sitting on so I wanted to come back here and chill sorry."

Laurence looked at him like B) and said "Sucks bro but ur cool you wanna be buds?"

"I mean alright, my names Henryk"

" Lol that’s GAY Im gonna call you Ryk" Laurence said with the B) face again.


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